The Journey Begins

February 3, 2013

Surah Al-Ikhlas
In the name of Allah, the Beneficent, the Merciful
Say: He is Allah the One and Only; (1) Allah, the Eternal, Absolute; (2) He begetteth not, nor is He begotten; (3) And there is none like unto Him. (4)
Who am I? Who are you? Who are we? A day comes, a day goes, yet this question is left unanswered! It seems pointless living life, not knowing one’s own self! Strange how we all are okay with that. I asked myself this very question and was dumbfounded. I did not know where to start, and that made me feel horrible. Having lived with myself for a quarter of a century, I had nothing to say about me!
Having pondered over it for a few days, I came up with something which made a little bit of sense.  There is one part of us which is an amalgamation of our family, friends, people around us and the experiences we have. That part of us is what defines our physical existence. What part of me has contributed to that definition? I found no individuality factor in this thought. There had to be more to me than just being a mixture of  mixtures. However, this thought brought me to another conclusion. That being, if we are a product of the above mentioned ingredients, and those ingredients are a product of another set of them, then it all has to converge somewhere, a single point, which is why I started this post with the chapter of the Holy Quran that declares the Oneness of Allah! Our very existence represents the Oneness of Allah! Having started for a single point and becoming such a complex creation, can only be the work of the Almighty, so powerful that He made a single point diverge into a vastness that can not really be defined. We thought, that the universe is expanding, it is, but so is the diversity of the human being.
But where is that one thing that makes me, Me! There has to be at least a particle of individuality in me! Something I can really call my self! Taking another few days to come up with an idea, I stumbled upon thought that I had pushed to the back of my mind.

Surah Al-Araf

And (remember) when thy Lord brought forth from the Children of Adam, from their reins, their seed, and made them testify of themselves, (saying): Am I not your Lord? They said: Yea, verily. We testify. (That was) lest ye should say at the Day of Resurrection: Lo! of this we were unaware; (172)
Our souls, the very souls mentioned in the above verse of the Holy Quran, had been created since the beginning of time. and placed in our bodies at the time of birth. The very souls that will be removed from our bodies when we die! Those souls are who we are. Our individuality particles, that define us. But how many of us know our souls, talk to our souls, feed our souls. Buried deep down in our bodies made of mud, just as if buried in ground. No matter how much fertilizer one puts in the soil, if not given water the seed will never germinate, grow, and split through the crust of the earth. The same way our soul will never emerge from within us and represent our individuality unless, we do not water it. We continue feeding the clay body with what it requires, what it demands, and what it desires, which only makes it harder for the soul to make its way to the surface. This is when I realized that the search of self discovery has just begun. Having identified the object to be defined, it is time to bring it to the surface, befriend it and get to know what it really is. Discussing this with a friend, I was reminded, that the way to go about it is to constantly fight the requirements, demands and desires of our bodies, that blur our identity and let our souls win each battle.
I failed to define who I am. However, I have managed to get one step closer. But the journey ahead is one full of storms, deadly summits, and wild beast that I will have to fend off before I emerge victorious! I might not make it to the end, but sincerely pray that if unexpected events bring my journey to an abrupt, unfinished end, I am in the state of trudging through the storm, towards my destination, and not finding shelter under a rock, I am climbing to the top of the summits which are a barrier in my journey, and not finding ways around it, I am fighting off the beasts that are blocking my path and not running in the other direction! Being granted true martyrdom! Please, oh please my dear Allah, accept this request! Grant me an end in such a state as to honor Your name, and the teachings of he who is the reason of my creation, Muhammad (SAW)!
Yes, you herd that right, the reason of my creation! Muhammad (SAW), for whom the Heavens and Earth were created! From the very Noor (light) of Muhammad (SAW), this universe came to be, and from his Noor were our souls created*! This is who we are, creations of the Almighty Allah, and created for Muhammad (SAW).
May Allah make my soul the master of my body!  May Allah fill my heart and mind with Noor-e-emaan, the light of Islam! And may He make the warmth of my soul melt the frozen hearts of those around me! May He light up the world with the souls of the Muslim Ummah!
*About this statement: My mother read a extract from a book called Noor-e-Mubeen (by Dr. Hamid Hassan Bilgrami) some time ago, I will go through that book again and quote the exact words from the author as soon as I get my hands on a copy of that book, inshAllah.

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